Life, Motherhood

Teaching kids about common sense

Like most moms, I worry about my son. I probably worry less than a lot of moms. One of the things that I often worry the most about is how my son will be as a grown adult. After all, I’m not raising a kid. I am raising an adult! One thing I’ve noticed is that my son lacks common sense. I always worry that maybe he never will have any common sense. As adults we have all met somebody like that at one time or another. However, for me, what really strikes home is that my own father is one of those adults. I feel like right here is where I add “bless his heart,” LOL. He’s my Dad and I love him dearly, but that is one of his little quirks. I think many who know him would likely confirm. So because of this, I am a little worried about my son. After all, how on earth do you teach common sense anyways? I mean I feel like I’ve always had it, that I was born with it. Of course it grew from learning experiences. That’s another thing, my son doesn’t appear to learn from “learning experiences.” He will lose or break something and will continue to do so unless I flat out put a stop to it by not buying replacements. So I don’t ever replace anything he loses or breaks anymore. Unless it was mine or his father’s. Back to my point as I am drifting away a bit here. Yesterday, he made another questionable choice as he starts shaking a juicy pickle slice in my living area. He does stuff like that all the time and it’s like, “really?! Why would you even do that?!” So after this incident I start trying to find articles on ways I can teach him common sense. As I stated before I was wondering if it was even possible. As I kept changing my search terms I only found like 2 or 3 even remotely relevant websites, forum posts, or answers on like Yahoo Answers and similar sites. One was a forum where a woman was concerned more about her daughter not learning daily hygiene and personal-care related common sense (even though her mother was teaching her hygiene and a daily routine since she was little.) What I got from online my research was one relatively good suggestion, and that is for me to try and teach my son problem solving skills with ?s. I didn’t mention yet, my son has a rather severe case of ADHD. He is a very challenging child, he has like a 2 second attention span and very easily ignores me. I think he may pick up only half of what I say. Sometimes I am surprised by what he does actually remember. So I wonder too, as I’ve noticed in addition to his lack of common sense he doesn’t have good problem solving skills. So it would make sense to teach him that first. The site that talked about using questions instead of statements to teach used examples where I would ask him a question (I will create my own example.) “Babies sippy cups often have leak-proof nozzles, why do you think cup makers would do that?” It’s a silly example but as I looked up at my cupboard where my cups are and that popped into my head. I am going to try that. Up until now, I kept on telling him over and over statements of facts like “This is why we do ___X___, so that ___X___ doesn’t happen.” But maybe it is time to rephrase as questions. It’ll help him not only with problem-solving but also critical thinking. I just need it to stick in is head more and think before he does something nonsensical like shaking a juicy pickle around in a room with a couch and a carpet. I mean if he must shake a pickle slice around because he likes to see it jiggle, there’s better rooms to do it in and even better take it outside and shake it all ya want! I hate to spoil his fun but there’s better ways to do things sometimes. Since there’s not much on this topic yet, I hope my post help someone else with a similar situation. It seems like when I bring my concerns up with friends or family members I get “Oh I wouldn’t even worry about it, he’ll be fine.” Then I’m thinking “wow, thanks,” in a sarcastic voice inside my head. I know some moms don’t like getting parenting advice from others but sometimes it’s kind of nice to hear what’s worked from other people. I just don’t like feeling judged by other people who question my parenting style. If somebody has helpful words of wisdom to share then I am game!

 

As always, I would love to hear ways you teach or taught your kids common sense.

Photo credit: http://www.solopreneursidekick.com

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